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Old 12-04-2009, 07:53 PM
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Default The Ten Laws of Theoryland

As Compiled through 4 years of Observation.

The Law of Infinite Family

If a pretty lady joins Theoryland, Sei'taer gains a sister.

The LoneStar Conundrum

At one point or another, every Theorylander will sleep within the geographical boundaries of the "Great" State of Texas. If it has not happened yet, fret not. It Shall, and that first sleep shall be a dreamless, peaceful one.

The Strangling Sinistrum Supposition

During their time posting at Theoryland, every Theorylander will fantasize, at least once, about holding Sinistrum's life in their bare, clenching, hands.

The DD Doctrine

Any mention of boobs at all will immediately turn all the men of Theoryland into creepy internet perverts, and guarantee at least 50 posts for the thread.

The Firseal Foundation

Firseal's candor, commedic timing, and clutch to anonymity implies only that he is a sentient internet anomoly, who, unlike his "daughter," Skynet, seeks only harmony between Humans and Machines.

The Philosophy of Fault

All things wrong with the Universe are to be blamed on Hamster Porn and/or Terez, with no exceptions.

The RogueSavior Requirement

If I, RogueSavior, post in a thread, it will devolve into one of three things. A Hot Chick thread, A sports thread, or me calling someone an idiot. Note, that these are not exclusive subjects.

The Cheesy Cucumber Conundrum

There is no food safe from being turned into a Euphemism for Sex. No, not even that one.

The ESC Expectation

In any single political conversation, half of the participants will take the debate way too seriously, the other half shall only contribute to the discussion with smart-ass remarks.

The Law of Reputation

When all else fails, make fun of the New York Yankees and/or RogueSavior. The meaner the better. Double Reputation points if you make him cry. "Crybaby gonna cry? Look, guys, he's delicate!"

Such shall henceforth be known as The Original Ten. I shall now add new laws, as they become known through rigorous observation.

The Beggar's Choice

Beg for reputation, and ye shall not receive it. No matter how deserving ye be, under the other laws.

The Edit Hypothesis

If you make a grammatical typo, and are quoted on it, editing it only makes you seem smrt. Very, very, smrt.

The Nickname Necessity

No matter how long you've been on Theoryland, how inappropriate the nickname is, or how long it's been since you've been called it, someone remembers. Theorylanders are like Elephants when it comes to nicknames. And Theorylander nicknames are like the Terminator - They'll be back. Always.

The Duty Dereliction Darwinist Principle

The longer it takes for a new member to receive their 'Official Greeting' from the 'Official Greeter,' the more likely they are to stick around out of stubborn refusal to be ignored.

The Inverse Strangling Sinistrum Supposition

See also, "The Strangling Sinistrum Supposition," but alternate all occurences of "every Theorylander" and "Sinistrum."
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Oh RS, that was magic-Ishara
and you were tasty!-Brita
That was fabulous m'dear
-Zaela
Hero of Theoryland

Last edited by RogueSavior; 12-05-2009 at 01:58 AM. Reason: Yes, Naz, yes it should. And then for New Laws. And then... And then...